«Field Guide to the Loner: The Real Insiders
Loners are pitied in our up-with-people culture. But the introvert reaps secret joy from the solitary life.»Introverts aren’t just less sociable than extroverts; they also engage with the world in fundamentally different ways. (…)
Contrary to popular belief, not all loners have a pathological fear of social contact. “Some people simply have a low need for affiliation,” (…)
Previous MRI studies have shown that during social situations, specific areas in the brains of loners experience especially lively blood flow, indicating a sort of overstimulation, which explains why they find parties so wearying. (…)
Acho que… that’s me, a loner. I used to be a lonely loner, and even had some times where I was not so loner but have always been lonely. You know, even with friends and with people around and going places and socializing. Always felt alone, like I could not truely connect to others. Like I never belong anywhere (group ou place). I realized it made me feel even lonelier and even more inadequate and alien and like I don’t fit. I longed for friends and socializing with them and with other people, and most of the times I just felt like a failure afterwards. Now I only have 1 person I call “friend”, and haven’t really socialized much with anybody outside my family. Funny enough, I usually feel much better now, I don’t feel lonely. I don’t miss anything or anyone. I like to be alone, I enjoy it, it works for me. This whole thing has some pretty obvious disadvantages (weak social safety net, and so on), but it’s who I am. I will always be a loner. I haven’t been lonely since I found my boyfriend. I hope I never have to feel that overwhelming, crushing feeling of being completely alone and alien in the world, I had all my life before we met and became so close.
Reading this made me feel less ackward, there’s other people out there who share some of these not-mainstream features. 🙂 Maybe I’m not from Mars, afterall. Or maybe there are more Martians on Earth than I supposed. ;-P
